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For me
cross-dressing started one weekend I think in the fall of 1958 I
was 10 years old . I tried to try on
a dress that belonged to a girl friend of my father, I believe
it was a soft black knit dress and I got caught both times that
I tried that weekend to get it on. I lived with my grand parents
on my father’s side of the family and they had come to visit
me and to take in a party in Uxbridge a town close by.
After that I
started collecting all the soft sweaters and scarves that were
around my grandmother’s place any thing that I could wear that
would make me look like a girl and that was soft. Puberty hit
when I was about 11 I think and I masturbated using a
old fur collar that we had and that really hooked me on soft
items. After that and watching television I started to really
fantasy about women in either knits or sexy dresses and furs and
dresses that revealed the more of a women’s bust the better.
Family life went on as normal my grand mother knew what I was
doing but never questioned me about any thing except one before
bed my aunt was there and just before bed I was asked why I
liked a certain sweater and I said because it was soft but that
was it until I was 14. We lived in the country and some people
moved in a cross the road and I could have sworn the woman was
wearing a fur coat and I made up my mind that I at least wanted
to see it and so one weekend when the people had gone away I
broke into the place but did not find what I was after but I did
find what I thought at the time was a relatively sexy dress and
took that ,I did get caught but when they realized that a guy
had stolen a dress they moved as fast as they could away from
our hamlet and the police had to drop the charges so I was lucky.Life
went on after that when I was 17 I joined the military but that
only lasted 8 months and I was out again basically my legs were
all muscle bound and I could not march so they released me.
During Christmas 67-68 I had met a girl and we started going out
together then we started having sex and using alcohol a little
and I started to get her to wear knits and I would also do this
and we would have sex and I would sort of play the part of her
lesbian partner and I enjoyed this,but
all good things do not last and eventually we broke up and I
moved back to my home town of Uxbridge and even though I liked
various girls I did not bother to date,as
I had collected quite a wardrobe of girls things and was quite
happy just creating sexual scenarios and masturbating.This
went on until I met a girl that would be my wife she was 17 when
we married ,but before we did that one Sunday she was at my
place and we were in the process of having sex and she some how
spotted a sweater in my drawer after that we went to see her
doctor who tried to explain to her about my fetishes but she was
to head strong and her attitude was she wanted me to love her
not what she was wearing, and so I quickly realised then that my
life with this woman was going to be a challenge ,we lasted 11
years and had two children. I got tired of hiding it, and so one
Friday night after she came home from her part time job and
found a small bag of my clothes and so I explained to her what I
knew from a book I had found in a variety store in 77 that
explained every thing that I had been going through since I was
a child. We did not talk about it any more that weekend but when
I came home from work on the Monday,I
was given a proposition we either go see a doctor or she would
pack up her and the kids and leave right then. Well going to see
a doctor didn’t bother me so that’s what we did for two
months I told the doctor the whole story and she talked to
Theresa but Theresa had her own mind made up and eventually on
Oct 1 84 we separated. I wanted to stay close to the children
and not abandon them so that is the main reason that I have not
taken the same route that a lot of girls do with the hormones
and every thing .In 92 I joined the cross-dressing club in
Toronto but a lot of the other patrons that went there after
dressing would just sit around and play cards and smoke and I
wanted to go out to dinner’s and dancing and things like that
and so I did not go for very long but still do my own thing here
where I live. I think things will get better in the near future
I am building up my credit rating after filing for bankruptcy a
few years ago and my job that I like and enjoy is starting to
pay more now so I hope that I will be able to enjoy life more soon.
Thank you for your time Samantha Lynn
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